Do yourself a favor and follow weirdmormonshit on instagram. This image is such a fabulous collage over the artwork of Arcade Fire's Neon Bible. The artist is a former mormon who pulls weird shit out of the Mormon archives and also creates images that portray a distorted reality. He shows how the underlying anxieties of mormonism dwell in the subconscious, whether you stay or leave.

When I lived in Boston for a time, I dropped out after a semester of theological study and discovered I was living in a place whose history and contemporary literature had much of the stew wherein Joseph Smith's early thoughts were born. I read a lot of 19th century history, literature, and when I was buried deep I remember feeling like the prophet's brain had a gravitational pull, much like hypnosis.  I really like the reflections of Jacob Bender's  blog on how an implicit Mormonism can be found in many of Arcade Fire's songs. Win Butler was raised Mormon, and I wonder how conscious he was of the dystopic nod to the mormon tabernacle organ on the record.

Lyrics from Ready to Start for example make you wonder:

"All the kids have always known
That the emperor wears no clothes
But they bow down to him anyway
'Cause it's better than being alone"

I remember being raised with a great fear of "anti-mormons."  I see that now as a tactic to isolate and scare me away from anyone that might make me question the story as the church tells it.  Weirdmormon shit understands that discovering reality is a trip. Living in the present and building a life grounded in real life is a gift, one that would never have been possible without the weird questions I had to ask to find my way out. Freedom is worth the ride, I will say, and whatever they may tell you, there is hope on the other side.